How to Plan a Surprise Proposal (Without Your Partner Guessing)

In the day and age of social media, you may find yourself surrounded by ideas for an epic proposal left right and centre, and feel the need to one up the those in the most recent video, but let me tell you: you do not have to spend hundreds of dollars, plan an elaborate set up, or make sure the lighting is just perfect for your proposal! Because really, it all comes down to one thing: if you show your love to your partner, and put in effort to make it personal and intimate, I can almost guarantee they are going to love whatever you do to pop the question.

How to Prepare to Propose

I highly suggest not comparing your ideas to those of social media, or other ideas on the internet, purely because the people you see on the internet are NOT you and your loved one. Every single couple has their own personal preferences for what they will enjoy and what they won’t, so don’t pick an idea off the internet just because it’s extravagant. Ask yourself: What will your partner like?

1.     Get a ring

a.     If your partner has been hinting at getting engaged, don’t be afraid to bring up ring ideas! You can do this in a very coy manner as well if you aren’t trying to let on that you are looking at rings. If you’re at a mall take them past the jewelry stores, and if they stop to look, even just a simple “Ok, I’ll humor you, what do you like?” will allow you to start seeing what they are looking for in a ring. And if they have Pinterest, I definitely suggest scoping out their board. There’s a high likelihood they will have a few pins of ones they like! And if your partner isn’t traditional and may not want a ring, think about another token that they may like instead to present to them.

2.     Think about the when

How soon are you hoping to propose? Is there a sentimental date? Will you have lots of time to plan and prepare, or very little? If you don’t want to choose a specific date and just wait for the right moment, just remember it might making hiding certain aspects of the proposal much more difficult.

3.     Where?

There are endless opportunities for where to propose. Here are some suggestions for deciding where to pop the question.

       i.     Is there a place of sentimental value?

       ii.     Are you more of a “keep it familiar” or “always trying new things” kind of couple?

       iii.     Will the possible location be crowded when you want to propose? If you want to keep it more intimate consider less known places.

        iv.     Do you have to be concerned about weather?

         v.     Are you wanting friends and family to be there to witness, and if so is it accessible?

4.     Do you need anyone else on board?

Depending on what you plan with your proposal, consider if you need to hire or recruit anyone to help you with it. Do you want a photographer to be there to capture the moments? Do you want a nice charcuterie board laid out for a treat after? Do you want a big “Will you Marry me?” sign. All are optional, but of course I will always recommend having a photographer!

5.     Do you have what you want to do and say figured out?

Sometimes a simple “Will you marry me?” is perfect, but there is also plenty room for more if you desire!

The Lead Up

The hardest part of a surprise proposal is literally keeping it a surprise.

Here is some tips to keeping your proposal a surprise

1.     Make sure you hide all signs that you have a ring. This includes receipts, ring boxes, flyers, bags from the jeweler… anything that might be used as evidence. You might consider this an easy task, but one slip up can ruin the whole thing.

2.     Be casual. If your mood is off, they are going to catch on that something isn’t normal. You might be able to brush it off as stress at work, or family life etc, but if your partner is perceptive, they will likely notice.

3.     Don’t act out of character while planning for the proposal. If you don’t normally “plan” keep the details on the down-low. Instead of saying, “Oh I booked us a trip to the mountains for the weekend” say “I thought it might be nice to get away for the weekend. I guess I should book a hotel.” Acting out of character will be a big red flag that you are planning something.

The Day Of:

There’s not much to say here, other than to just act natural and be yourself! Whatever you have planned will be sure to knock them off their feet, and hopefully you will get a “Yes!” in the process. And if you aren’t able to stick 100% to the plan, that works too! Sometimes the best moments are completely unfiltered and unplanned. However, always keep your partner’s thoughts and feelings in mind, and don’t be afraid to pivot. If the location you picked out is really crowded when you get there, and you know your partner would rather an intimate proposal rather than in public, enjoy the location and move somewhere else quieter. Remember, you know your partner best, so you are the best on to judge where and when to pop the question!

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Hopefully this guide helps give you ideas and some things to think about for planning the perfect proposal! If you have any other suggestions, feel free to drop them in the comments below!